Sally: Proclaiming the peace of God

IMG_3369Catherine Williams gave the inspiring message at the funeral for Sally Ross on Monday, April 28. Here is the text of her sermon, based in part on Sally’s obituary and on Psalm 139.

At one point Catherine quoted the obituary, “Sally was committed to building a supportive church community. She was an active member of the PUMC, sang soprano for the choir, served on numerous committees, assisted with countless fundraisers and did practically everything but preach.”

It is this last phrase – did practically everything but preach – that I find interesting. I am a currently a third year doctoral student of Homiletics (preaching) at Princeton seminary, and one of the things I have constantly wrestled with in my study is a working definition of preaching that I find satisfactory.

I’m thinking of this dictum that has been dubiously attributed to Saint Francis of Assisi that says, “Preach the gospel at all times and when necessary use words.”  On that basis, I do think that Sally did a little preaching herself.

But there’s one other message Sally preached that quilters and crafters may comprehend more easily. Again Psalm 139 is my reference point because the Psalmist speaks of a God who is involved in the details of our lives. The Psalmist reflects, “For it was you who formed my inward parts; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; that I know very well.”

It was as though the Psalmist could see God leaning over a masterpiece, working with deft, nimble hands to create a unique, one-of-a-kind person – right from the womb. Anyone of the unique, one-of-a-kind quilts or handmade shawls and garments made by Sally is a picture that paints a thousand words of God’s intimate, creative involvement in our lives and indeed in the world.

Yes, I would contend that Sally did everything in church, including a little preaching. She may have found this notion hilarious, but she did. She proclaimed the unconditional love of God through her friendships. She proclaimed the wisdom of God through her timely counsel. She proclaimed the steadfastness of God through her persistence and resilience in her fight with cancer. She proclaimed the peace of God, even in her dying….

For the complete text, click here.

 

 

In honor of Sally Ross

Anna Looney gave one of the tributes to Sally Ross, buried today. Here is a link to the obituary. Anna began with quotes from The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Expery:

“But if you tame me,” said the fox to the Little Prince, “then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world….”

The Little Prince said to the pilot,“Of course I’ll hurt you. Of course you’ll hurt me. Of course we will hurt each other. But this is the very condition of existence. To become spring, means accepting the risk of winter. To become presence, means accepting the risk of absence.”

At this moment, as we come together to remember and celebrate Sally, I’m conscious of how words fail us at this time of heart-breaking loss. We struggle to speak of her courage and love, not knowing how we will carry on without her.

So many people have shown their love for Sally Ross. Her beautiful obituary stated Sally’s deeply held value: “being there for your loved ones is the most important thing you can do.” This was Sally through and through: Sally was there for Charles, Andrew, Claire and Grace. She was there for friends and neighbors. She was unfailingly generous with her time, her attention and her presence even in the difficult years of dealing with cancer. Sally did not complain or check out when her health was challenged; I can’t recall one time when she begged off a request to help or a chance to do something kind for someone else. Sally never showed self-pity for the hard hand she was dealt.

By being present, Sally was an inspiration. Just a couple weeks ago, I asked her how she coped, having such a cheerful attitude, and she replied that each of us has this day, this present time, no guarantees. She said it so matter-of-factly.

Sally lived the fullest and best life possible, with absolute grace and true beauty.

Charles has said Sally was his perfect complement: cheerful and upbeat no matter what challenges life threw at them. I found Sally brought the same kind of positive attitude to all of us. Yet she was not a Pollyanna; Sally was a strong woman with a voice, opinions and a keen mind. We talked over life’s hard knocks and injustices, as well as our own foibles and silliness, all within a framework of genuine affection, humor and the benefits of age.

I cannot begin to describe how many ways Sally’s friendship blessed me and enriched my life. Most recently, Sally inspired me to try quilting. When I dreamed up a crazy plan of making a Christmas present quilt for my daughter, Sally helped me in every step —- showing me with patience and support how to do it, while step by step the sheets and batting were turned into a bed cover that was precisely what they wanted. (Seriously, she shocked and amazed me when she boldly took her scissors to expensive fabric, making necessary cuts required by the process, when she took the huge thing home and sewed it up, then together we chalked the quilting grid, both of us crawling around on the floor with pins and yardsticks to mark off the squares.)

At our New Year’s Eve party, Sally talked about the history of quilting and showed examples of quilts she’s made. Her beautiful handiwork caused us collectively to catch our breaths. Shortly afterwards, Sally taught me my first steps in quilting – a craft that I will continue, always with thoughts of Sally.

In fact, Sally’s quilting skills were another embodiment of her inner person. Through her kindness, warmth, and loving hospitality, Sally brought people together.Just as she had an eye for placing fabric into a master design, Sally brought people together around their table, in her living room, in her lovely back yard…. Sally made everyone feel included, loved and important.

What Sally did with fabrics, she also did with people in her life: weaving odd bits into a beautiful design that brought out the best in everyone and every thing.

I cannot begin to express how deeply I will miss Sally. Not having her physically present in my life is something I cannot fathom right now…She is indeed ‘our beloved Sally.’

Sally inspired me to be a better person through her friendship and example. I’m sure I speak for many here today that herlegacy inspires usto greater kindness and presence, to more intentional generosity and patience, to authentic loving service and commitment, and to divine grace and beauty.

Like the works of art her quilts are, Sally has created a life well-lived, full to the brim, bursting with color andsuffused with meaning. As her life and friendship have been a wonderful blessing to me – and to all of us, her impact will never leave us.

Like the Little Prince said to the pilot, when we look at the stars, we will think of our relationship. Sally is present in our hearts always. I am reminded again of James Taylor’s song – “Shower the people you love with love; show them the way you feel.”

In honor and celebration of our beloved Sally, let us be present today to each other. Let us shower the people we love with love. Let us find ways to connect with each other like beautiful patchwork quilts.

Stand Against Racism: April 25

Everyone is invited to the 7th annual Stand Against Racism on Friday, April 25, from 5:45 to 8:30 p.m. at the Hinds Plaza, by the Princeton Public Library. Participants will make a pledge and sign a banner.

There will be music and messages, followed by a discussion inside the community room at the library. This event has been arranged by the Princeton YWCA and the Princeton Human Services Commission and it is co-sponsored by Not in Our Town and its member congregations. So come on out to this inspiring community event!

This event was originally announced to begin at 6:30 p.m. but everyone is encouraged to come when they can, leave when they must.

 

Our Beloved Sally

sallyIt is with great sadness that we share the news of the death of Sally Ross.  Sally was a long-time member of Princeton United Methodist Church, and an active member of the Chancel Choir, United Methodist Women, and the Communications Committee.  For the obituary in the Times of Trenton, click here.

We ask for your prayers for Sally’s husband, Charles Phillips, and their family.

Visitation will be at Mather Hodge Funeral home on Saturday, April 26​, 3-5PM.  The Funeral Service will be at Princeton UMC on Monday, April 28 at 11AM​.  Interment will be at Princeton Cemetery. For parking suggestions, click here.

In lieu of flowers, memorial gifts may be made to the Christian Education Department of Princeton United Methodist Church or the United Front Against Riverblindness (UFAR).

Landscape of Lent: Palms

2014 4 13 palm doors

Rev. Jana Purkis-Brash delivered a message on “Palms” on Sunday, April 13, 2013, based on Matthew 21:1-11, and 26:14-16. To read the sermon, click here. She closed her message with these words:

We who are called to have the mind and spirit of Jesus betray him when we allow our own self-interest, our own prejudices, our own tacit acceptance of the status quo to limit the ways in which we could help make God’s kingdom a reality here on earth, as it is in heaven.

We betray Jesus when we see people in need and close our hearts against them.

We betray Jesus when we gather wealth (coins) into our own hands while others live in hunger and poverty.

We betray Jesus when we know what he would do but are afraid to do it.

We betray Jesus when we ignore the love he insisted upon and embrace hate.

Palms of praise easily can become palms of betrayal. And because of that, because of our human insistence on hating, hurting, and hoarding, Jesus opens his own palms in love and dies even while pleading for humanity, “Forgive them, Father, they don’t know what they are doing.”

Sometimes, I think we do know what we are doing, or failing to do. But the amazing thing about the love of God in Jesus is that when we fess up to our sin and confess it,we are embraced by the grace that was given to us through those palms.

Palms of praise, palms of betrayal, palms of loving grace: “Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord,” and may those who go in his name be a blessing as well.

Today as you leave worship you will be given a palm of praise, receive it and carry it remembering that we are called to praise the living Christ. Today you will also be given a coin, receive it and carry it reflecting on how you betray Christ. Journey through this week anticipating the pitcher and basin, the bread, the cup, nails and finally resurrection celebration. In this week, fully prepare to meet the risen Christ.

2014 13 crown of thorrns(the crown of thorns was on the altar)

Adult Study: “Moral Tribes”

adult ss contemporaryContemporary Issues adult class is reading “Moral Tribes: Emotion, Reason, and the Gap Between Us and Them,” by Joshua Greene. It meets every Sunday in the PUMC library at 9:30 a.m. on Sunday mornings — with the possible exception of April 27 when there will be only one worship service at 9:30.  “We welcome new attendees at any time,” says Charles.

According to reviewer Vanessa Bush, “Greene’s strategies for examining moral reasoning are as applicable to day-to-day decisions as they are to public policy. This is a highly accessible look at the complexities of morality.”

The Heart of Faith class has moved to the Fellowship Hall at the same time, 9:30, and various studies during the week welcome newcomers.

Landscape of Lent: Cave

2014 4 6 stones box 2014 4 6 stones

In the story as told in the gospel of John, said Catherine Williams in her sermon on April 6, Lazarus probably  counted on Jesus coming to heal him. She imagined how he would have felt:

“You take to your fevered bed that night in hope. You rise next morning feeling frighteningly worse than last night, and you ask for news of Jesus. . . Now the sun has begun to set; Jesus is still not here. By now you feel yourself enveloped in a thick, dark cloud of disappointment, anger, fear, and abandonment. You wonder if this what death feels like…

Sometimes we feel abandoned, like Lazarus, Catherine said. She quoted theologian Gordon Lathrop’s book on the ‘little deaths’ we face in the course of living. Lathrop speaks of “moments of physical sickness or disability, or the moments of letting go, of moving on, or of facing failure, all of which can be described in metaphoric language as having something of death about them.”

To Lathrop’s listing she added: strained or severed relationships with living persons, mental and emotional pathologies, loss of employment or underemployment, loneliness, betrayal, and a host of other little deaths that begin to close in around us, cutting off our hope, our connections, even our faith, and leaving us entombed by circumstances beyond our control. . .

Near the end of her message, she pointed out that Lazarus’s name meant “God is my help,” and that he had no idea where, or how close,  his help was.

He only knew he was trapped in circumstances utterly beyond his control, and could see no way out. Which means that for the person in the cave, all I’ve said until now may mean absolutely nothing. But the fact that you are here in this gathered community of faith is symbolic of something hopeful. It symbolizes that you are part of a wider community that cares, and that believes the life of God has the power to destroy death, and that the light of Christ cannot be overpowered by darkness.

(The entire message is here.)

Altar design by Debbie Meola and photos are by Edem Timpo.

Fellowship Hall: Celebrate on May 3

fellowship hall celebration

Our ground floor space has turned from a homely caterpillar into a beautiful butterfly, thanks to our Opening Doors capital campaign. Everyone is invited to help celebrate the transformation of the Fellowship Hall!

On Saturday, May 3, at 6 p.m., enjoy a delicious sit down dinner with entertainment provided by our own Scott Langdon and music by the PUMC Ensemble. Hear about how we used to be known as the ‘Rowdy Methodists,’  learn about we changed during our 165 years — and help launch our future work for Christ in the new space.

Tickets will be available in the Sanford Davis room after each service.  Suggested donation: adults $10.00 per person, $5.00 for children. Get yours soon — tickets will not be sold at the door.

Elisa Neira MSW at UMM Breakfast

2014 4 11 Elisa neiraElisa Neira, Princeton’s director of human services, will speak at the United Methodist Men’s breakfast on Sunday, April 13, at 8 a.m. in our newly renovated Fellowship Hall.

Elisa has an impressive resume, having worked with the Latino immigrant community in New Brunswick and with the New Jersey Association of the Deaf/Blind. In addition to being fluent in English and Spanish, she speaks sign language and has some French. She has a BS in social work from Rutgers and an MSW from Fordham.

Hunger is one of the important issues she is working on at the Department of Human Services. Some of her clients are still going hungry, she has said,  though they are using all available services. She is also concerned with immigration issues, such as stopping wage theft and tuition equality.

A $5 donation will be accepted for the outstanding hot breakfast.